I think it’s safe to say that it’s time to retire my header. Last chance to see:
Just for the record, it’s a cropped still from “Tourist Trap”, that grand 80’s slasher flick about telekinetic redneck Mr. Slausen’s doomed romance with “last girl” Molly–or as one of Slausen’s mannequin henchmen calls her, Molllleeeeeee!!!
Slausen (right) is pictured here trying to convince Molly (left) to remain in his attic as his prisoner, and whenever my sister Diane and I see this movie, we kinda wish she’d say yes. Chuck Connors’ longing is so palpable, his ability to control showroom dummies with telekinesis so dashing. All this and overalls! What’s with the cognitive dissonance, Molly?
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This header went up when I felt ready to commit to a summer spent in the trailer with my very own Mr. Slausen, who you know as Bob. And what a summer it was, just the one we expected to have when we first came up here, full of unexpected fun and relaxation. I still fondly recall the arrival of the heavy metal cow deity to Morris Lake, the cheap-wine-tasting night at our neighbor’s double-wide, etc. I was as happy as I’d always imagine Molly might have been, had she stuck to the script.
Then winter set in, and Bob got busy with work. Soon lightbulbs started to fizzle, pipes started to freeze, and my psychic redneck princess fantasy began to crumble and crack. If the apartment hadn’t come through when it did, it’s quite possible that things in the Prowler would have resolved the way Molly’s and Mr. Slausen’s romance did–with a hatchet.
So this header is being retired, in the hopes that our new life in the apartment will be one with a little more fairness for both of us. No more heavy lifting for Bob, no more heavy leaning for me, and a creepy new town to explore besides.
This is how we always pictured it, now it’s time to see the picture through–and the new header is just the picture for that.